Looking For Love

As I'm sitting here watching The Bachelorette, a few things came to my mind. Have we as people gone too far with looking for love? Please know that I'm in no way bashing the show. Hey, if reality television is all about getting viewer's attention, then by all means, go for it. However, I find the majority of reality TV shows are overrated. I felt for Ashley when she cried her eyes out on The Bachelor. I can't say that I blame her because who wants to be rejected? Rejection is one thing, but having to be rejected in front of millions of viewers is over the edge for me.

I hope Ashley will be with her true love. I can't mince words, so I will be quite frank on how I feel about love. Love is a beautiful gift for anyone to receive. And it's sad that we waste love on what we want it to be. Nowadays, some people, if not all, believe that love is solely based on looks, which is true to a certain extent. Let's be honest with ourselves, physical attraction shouldn't be the only factor we look for while settling for love.

I'm about to explain why. If you really think about this, I mean really ponder the possibilities on why people are so hungry for love. Why are people pursuing it?

One, no one wants to be lonely and it's not good for anyone to be alone.

Two, people are in a hurry to follow society "standards" on what they believe is a good age to find love.

Three, boredom.

Four, just to please friends who are already couples.

Five, having a significant other symbolizes that you are somebody.

Six, just because the relationship is "convenient."

If there are more, then feel free to add on to this list. Love is something to not be tampered with. Love is the greatest gift of all, yet many have failed to understand the true meaning of love.

1 Corinthians 13 explains in detail what real love is about. You can check it out for yourself. In the meantime, I will paraphrase. You can have everything in the world and still feel empty inside. If you have nothing to offer in life, life really has no meaning. If you're only looking out for self and not caring about the interests of others, love is definitely not in the equation.

Love is selfless and it is kind. Love is not rude nor boastful and it doesn't seek pleasure to hurt others, nonetheless, shame them.

Love breathes on you easily as the wind blows on your skin. Love is second nature like breathing. Love possesses a definition all on its own and it's shown through action.

How is love shown through action? It's simple. With us. I'm smiling as I write this because I'm very concerned with how the world view love today. And I'm saddened with the idea that we are so quick to grab what society calls love. If someone is going out his or her way for you, whether this person is a parent, friend, or even a person who is sent through divine intervention, his or her intention is to make sure you are happy.

He or she is concerned for your well-being. He or she sees the potential in you and encourage you to go on and seek what you desire for your life. His or her desire is to assist you without selfish intent and hope to see that you live out your wildest dreams.

There are all kinds of love: humanitarian, family, platonic, and even romantic.

I believe what most people are desperate for is: romance.

Some people feel you are complete when you find your soul mate. That couldn't be more further from the truth. Love starts with us. I'm learning to appreciate me, adoring me, and seeking out all that is waiting for me. That's why I'm able to extend myself to others. Even though, there are times when I will get hurt in the process. I've already found a love so pure and deep that no one can ever fill in my heart. When I gave my life to the Lord, He has shown me the true meaning what love is. He gave His only begotten son Jesus to die for you and me. But a man with such manner as this to sacrifice his own life for us. No love can compare to that.

I'm breathing again because of God. I was in such a broken place that I didn't find a reason to live anymore and I was 22, at the time, thinking about suicide.

At 23, I was serious about finding God and wanting to see this destiny He has mapped out for my life. And now I have a purpose in my life to help others and I pray my writing will be effective in your life to pursue all that God desires for you. I, at one point, was searching for a romantic love and every time I've tried, I have failed miserably. I shouldn't look for love because society says, "Oh, if you don't have someone to love you, you are worthless or something is wrong with you." And that is where Satan deceive people.

Yes, I'm still young, but right now I'm focusing on me. I don't need a boyfriend at this stage in my life because there is so much God wants me to do on Earth. Of course, I want to fall in love and I would be lying to you if I say I don't. I yearn to have a companion who will love me just the way I am and accept my flaws. I want to be honest and feel that I don't have to pretend for someone to get me. Either the person relates to you or he or she doesn't. You can't force love and expect it to come when you think it should. You will only set yourself up for disappointment. Make yourself whole by finding activities you enjoy. Get involved with helping others and see their needs that you don't normally see. Look closer of what's going on inside the individual.

You'll be surprise what effect you can have on a person's life by just being present. Take the time to care and extend yourself to be in his or her world.

Be open and be willing to explore, even if most people won't receive you. Make your time productive.

I don't want you to misconstrue what I'm saying. I'm all for achieving goals in life because without a dream in your heart, you will perish. While you're on your journey to success, search for love by being available to others and meeting their needs as well. For it is better to actually care for someone who has given up on life versus causing someone unnecessary pain just because you don't agree with what he or she say to you. You can't go wrong with sharing. You'd be surprise what opportunities will be available to you when you take the time to care.

Love will come when you least expect it. Whatever stage you are in your life, focus on what you need to do, so you can be a better you when you meet others along the way. May your day be filled with love and know that you are loved and cared for. Know this:  as long there is breath in your body, you have something to live for. Love is already at your door, but you have to be willing to let it in, even if it's not what you expect it to be. You're worth loving and knowing. Always know it.